“So what I am suggesting here  is a complete approach to our waters where the competitive, lip-ripping edge is left back in the fast lane of societal superficialities and the joyful spirit of camaraderie, sportsmanship, and involvement with nature are the main goals”.  Jerry Kustich

I get a sense that my fly-fishing is a more messy affair than it is for the guys I bump into around these parts. 

Take Squidlips from Smoketown for example:  He  drives his blue Nissan up to the Bushmans on an appointed Saturday, and a day later there are a dozen glossy pictures on social media , most of which are of oversized browns. In fact there are few pictures of anything else. Slick.

I, on the other hand went fishing for a day a few week-ends back  and did little better than get caught in a storm.  In fact I got caught in two storms on the same day, the latter of which convinced me to go home.

On the way home the road was as dry as can be, and I threw up dust all the way back down the valley.   On my return I learned that squidlips had had a red-letter day in the adjacent valley. I had managed a 10 inch Rainbow, in total.

And the week-end before my wife and I carried a stile up a river valley and installed it in the hot sunshine beside a low river, amongst the brambles.

On our return we found that the coating on the upright had been wet and our clothes were trashed. I threw that pair of board shorts away after even petrol failed to remove the treacle.    It was too hot to fish, and the river was hideously low.  On the same day squidlips got a stonker of a fish on a stillwater not more than a few kilometers distant from our expedition.

On a midweek foray up the same valley, I didn’t even take a fly-rod. I just went to look at the condition of the river, and as it turned out, I walked a good five kilometers up the river, and returned the same way, getting home at eight that night.

On another foray to shoot clay pigeons, I did so badly that I very narrowly missed being awarded the “bent barrel” award.  Apparently Squidlips is a crack shot.

A few weeks ago, I accompanied two mates onto a stretch of river to do some fishing and filming.  The river was low, and it was hot.  I spotted two fish, one of which I photographed, and both of which I spooked. After that I spent most of the time walking and checking on the river and taking photos of my pal fishing.

At sometime in between, PD and I stayed over at a cottage right on the shore of a dam, and fished the Saturday evening and Sunday morning.  The wind howled, and the water was dirty, and PD landed one fish, while I blanked. We spent a lot of time drinking tea off the camp stove and chatting, out of the wind.

Then on the way to fishing I picked up some coffee beans that just would not produce any crème on my espresso. I tried a finer ground, a harder tamp, and more coffee, all to no avail. All I got was a strong, bitter, over-extracted coffee. I swear I could hear the motor on my grinder straining!  Even the camp stove coffee that I made beside my vehicle at the river’s edge, had a thin acidity that made my lips curl.  Squidlips buys a generic, ready-made cappucino from the local garage, just before he hits the freeway on the way to fishing.  He reckons its perfect every time.

But here’s the thing:  I took the time to chat to the guy who sold me the coffee beans. He acknowledged a bad batch of beans and replaced the bag with a smile and no need for  a receipt.  He knows me from my regular stops there ….I tend to drop in either on the way to catching no fish, or on the way back.

And  to add to that, this month, I learned the local  name of a mountain above a favourite trout water, which on all the maps, bears no label. And I walked miles up a beautiful remote river valley, re-orientating myself as to where the tributaries come in, and exploring the strength of their flow, and dangling my fingers in each one to see which is colder for future reference.

And  at clay-pigeon shooting I re-acquainted with old friends and managed to confirm who owns a particular piece of river frontage. And on the way back from my walk in the hills I spotted a man who I needed to contact about some bramble clearing work, and we spoke at length in the dusk in the countryside.  Then this week I made some progress towards raising further funds for some restoration work on tributaries which Squidlips does not know exist (on account of them being too small to hold fish).

Squidlips phoned me midweek to ask about a particular piece of water. I tried to give him directions, but it was impossible, because he knew none of the features of the countryside to which I referred. He travels that valley all the time, but all he knows is the distances and road numbers, while I know the names of the hills, the owners of the farms, and the the mountain names (but no distances or road numbers)

Sometimes I beat myself up about my countryside distractions, that lead to limited fishing, coupled with duffer performance on the rare pure fly-fishing trips that do eventually come to pass. But then I  think about the clinical life of Squidlips, and I think that he can have his blue Nissan, and Smoketown and his grip and grin pictures.  Gierach once famously referred to his type as “city folk, with no poetry in their souls”.

I vote for messy.