Waters & words : a celebration of flyfishing

Danes , gimps, and whimsical theories

We think our Great Dane rather dim, and more than a little quirky, when the only way he will cross the dining room, is in reverse with my daughter’s shirt in his mouth. 

Danes (1 of 1)

But that is nothing. Let me tell you some crazy stuff about us fly-fishermen!

I quite recently listened with care and respect, while a hatchery man told me that he doesn’t breed Brown Trout, because the Rainbow alevins, just gobble up all the Brown alevins within days of hatching.


I have also heard it said, (More than once) that a float tube has an advantage over a kick boat, because your profile is lower, and that the Trout are therefore less likely to see you. Think about that one………..

Another beaut is the guys who will tell you that in a tube or kick boat, you can turn around and fish through 360 degrees of undisturbed water. …Uh….hum.  Back cast…?

You would think that most of these gems would be gleaned from pubs, which might I say, is where they belong. But no, they are just as often delivered on a fresh sunny, sober morning!

Then there was a mate of mine, since deceased, who insisted that his woolen jersey kept him warm despite the fact that it was raining hard. He would sit out there in his boat, soaked to the skin, and weighed down in sodden wool, while I watched him through the mist from the relative comfort of a rain jacket.

One mate who was fearful of over-inflating his float tube,  fished in what looked like an under-filled shopping bag, with the waves occasionally breaking into his waders. I reckon he hung in the balance between floating and sinking to the bottom of the lake for good. We have since talked some sense into him!

The other twisted one which one often encounters is “all Browns only feed at night”. Which has me puzzled as to how I catch all my daytime browns.



Another beaut is the story of what happened “just the other day”.  A member of the local fishing club was caught with an entire boot-load/coolbox-full of Trout(the story varies) on a water in the Kamberg. The story repeats itself every three years , and has done ever since the event actually did occur in the nineteen seventies!

Speaking of madness:  I was recently at Highmoor with my friend Graeme. We were both on the upper lake where things were rather slow, I said to Graeme that I was nipping to the lower water, to feel a tug on the end of my line, since fishing has been more of a sure thing down there lately. Upon arriving I noticed a woman, hiking in a long skirt and boots. She walked up onto the hillside, where she then proceeded to walk back and forth, occasionally waving her arms in the air, and intermittently throwing herself on the ground. When the breeze abated, I heard her shouting at the top of her voice. While she was doing this, the point fly I was fishing, inexplicably came off. I reeled in to tie on a new one, and so as not to be outdone I cursed and swore into the wind as well.  This either offended her, or she didn’t like the competition , or perhaps it was that her voodoo fly –removing  magic was done, because by the time I looked up from tying on a new fly, she had disappeared into the hills.

She actually re-appeared later at the top dam, and upon noticing Graeme out on the water in his float tube, she shouted out a sort of nautical “Ahoy there” into the wind. She tried several times, each time waving her hands theatrically as though to a departing ship. Graeme did what I would have done, and ignored her, and after a while she threw it in and returned to wherever she had come from.

Another crazy one doing the rounds is a completely absurd story that involves my friends and I. Apparently, or so the story goes, years ago we requested a student’s discount on a group fishing week-end. Having been granted some relief from the burden of the accommodation bill, we allegedly arrived in a Mercedes and a four wheel drive, with a case of beer each, and to eat, just half a tomato between us.

How absurd!  It just goes to show: you cant believe any of this stuff.

9 responses

  1. This is the stuff right here. Well done, sir!

    October 17, 2014 at 11:39 pm

    • Thank you Mike

      October 19, 2014 at 7:36 pm

  2. Alas fly fishing discussion seem to be largely made up of myth. Personally I am happy to listen to any reasonable argument so long as it can be backed up with some logic.However much discussion in fly fishing seems to be the mere regurgitation of previously held concepts without consideration of the actual facts, I suppose it is up to each of us to question things and come to our own conclusions, which is in the end part of what makes it all special. Right now I am questioning the long held belief that fluorocarbon gives one an advantage fishing in stillwaters. I have come to doubt that bit of marketing spin. To date I haven’t noticed any difference from reverting to Mono’ other than that I break off less fish. 🙂

    September 19, 2014 at 5:46 am

    • I agree with you. It is also funny about fishing myths like you need a big and a fast boat to fish efficiently. My dad and I used to go out with a small, rusty old boat and we often had plenty of big catches LOL Skill sometimes comes with luck, but it will never be about how flashy your boat is 🙂

      September 26, 2014 at 3:25 pm

  3. Yeah! What’s with the tomatoes? Coulda carried an extra case of beer. Funny stuff.

    September 19, 2014 at 12:37 am

    • Ja…I regret that tomato!

      September 21, 2014 at 12:30 pm

  4. To paraphrase Robert Wyatt, a fisherman’s lunacy fits in neatly with my own…

    September 19, 2014 at 12:31 am

  5. kevin123k

    Absolutely – who on earth would go fishing with half a tomato, a few cases of beer for sure!!

    September 18, 2014 at 9:12 pm

  6. Kenov

    We’re an odd bunch, to be sure. And our quirks are surely less endearing than those of our dogs.

    September 18, 2014 at 8:11 pm

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